Silas' Big Boy Bed

It was a rash decision but, but last Monday morning, on the eve of Henry heading to preschool, we converted Silas' crib to a big boy bed. We had started talking with Silas about the idea after we returned from vacation and although he showed very short spurts of interest he always returned to "no" and other sentiments that meant he liked things just the way they were.


Then on Monday morning we started talking about changing his bed and he went for it. He said he wanted to "change my bed" several times and seemed genuinely excited. JT and i talked about the rational reasons it wasn't a great idea; a) we were going to be gone all day at a BBQ so he wouldn't actually be home to get used to it, b) the next day was Henry's first day of school and we didn't want to start off with a terrible night's sleep and c) if things went awry we wouldn't have the weekend to recuperate.

But, we threw those concerns out the window and decided to be led by the fact that the child that has made it clear he doesn't like change, was embracing, nay excited for this transition. We all took a turn with the ikea wrenches and voila-- big boy bed!

Silas was over the moon about his new bed and played happily in it all morning. He took his usual nap upstairs and then we headed out to Tiffany and Mike's for our labor day BBQ. He was clingy and difficult at the BBQ but in the few moments when he'd let me put him down and wander over to the other kids, he'd quickly saunter back and whisper "my bed" with this happy, sly smile that he's great at.


That night he was over the moon to sleep in his bed and so far there has been no falling out of bed or midnight escapades. He and Henry often wake up before 7 now, but talk or read quietly to each other until 7 when they both come bounding up the stairs to wake us up. It's very, very dear and helps smudge some of the harsh edges around the difficulties we've begun to emerge from with Silas.

Babys and babas and george, oh my!

Very, very busy lately. That delicate balance between work and home was pretty much obliterated this past week. I traveled to DC Wed afternoon for a two day training. The days leading up to the training were frantic work days with many extra hours logged in the evening. I was stressed, i didn't get to work out, and in general it was not how i like to spend my days. We're still busy but i'm really hoping that things will be back to normally busy this week. I've got another training (and another trip) in two weeks, but it's one we do each year to there isn't as much prep for it.

The boys seem to be doing just fine. Brenda was closed Mon-Wed so they spent two days at another home daycare run by a woman i've met through the parent support group for our elementary school. All reports were that they were very happy. She's said to let her know if we ever need back-up care which is a great resource to have indeed.

Henry has thrown out a few funny sayings lately. Last weekend a few minutes into quiet time he knocked on his door. When i went to see what the problem was he said-- "what's that noise?" I told him it was the Cuisinart and he said "well i was curious about that noise." Later that day he came in from sitting on the porch with JT as i was drawing his bath and said something like "Mom, the point is, that i need to watch George after i take a bath." I assumed JT has used the expression but said Henry worked it into his dialogue all himself. He's a talker that one.

Silas is great; funnier and sillier than ever. But also really not liking going to sleep nowadays. I must take a picture of his crib. The "usual" includes his two life-size baby dolls, a small stuffed baby, his original lovey bunny and backup bunny, a small curious george doll, an oversize george book, 2 (of the same) kitty books, a small george notebook, and two other normal sized george books-- as well as the cat book he got for his birthday. Plus, on any given night he picks something else he *has* to have in bed with him. Last night we fought a major battle because he wanted to sleep with his school bag (!?) JT and i felt with it's handles it was just too much of a safety threat but the poor thing was crying and sobbing hysterically as if his comfort hinged on the school bag (something he's never, not once, mentioned at any other point in his life.) And don't forget, he has to be covered-up with two special "ba-bas" (blankets). Problem is he says "two" for everything and now he's up to 3-4 blankets for him to be satisfied. I'm worried he's going to be a hoarder later in life. Anyone think this is normal?

Sleep Training- A Response

I have a good friend that is embroiled in sleep-training her little one. We had our fair share of sleep-training with both Henry and Silas (who were difficult in different ways) and I've managed to become somewhat of an expert on some different techniques for the grueling process. Lots of people don't agree with any version of sleep training but we do. JT and I believe that you're teaching a child how to sleep well for the rest of their lives. Tammy posted some sleep training questions and i thought i would use this post to provide my answers to them. For the record there are two sleep books i would absolutely read: The first is Weissbluth's Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child and if you happen to have a non-colicky baby the book 12 Hours Sleep in 12 Weeks.

1. Do we set up our pre-training “bedtime” environment? Do we turn on white noise, let her turn on her crib aquarium, leave music playing, dim lights? Or is now the time to simplify our sleep “crutches”? (we left our set-up the same)

You need a routine for bedtime. It can be very simple. If you already have one continue to do it. If you want to inject one additional thing (i think the white noise would be great especially given question 7) but i wouldn't add any additional steps before you actually put her down to sleep.

2. What if she poops/pees?
I thought she had pooped one night so I changed her. It turned out to just be pee, but it probably was good to wake her up a smidge after the feeding anyway.

If she poops you need to change her. No worries if it's just a wet diaper. It's nice not to have to change her but if you do you do and it's not a deal breaker. Unless you have reason to suspect she's got a dirty diaper after you feed her, i would change her before you feed her so that she's already drowsy and ready to go back to sleep after you feed her.

3. What about naps? Do we do sleep training for her daytime naps? We can NEVER get her to take naps. Still completely unresolved.

If she's having a hard time with naps you will most likely want to sleep train her with naps as well. Speaking from personal experience, i would wait to work on naps until you've got the nighttime ironed out pretty well. Weissbluth offers sleep research to indicate that daytime and nighttime sleep are neurologically different. Therefore using sleep training techniques at night and not during the day isn't actually confusing. Based on some of the same research though, daytime sleep is more difficult to "train." Ideally you will be healthy and have some good nighttime sleep under your belt before you attempt nap training. You must read the Weissbluth book before you get started because you will have many questions about how to do this.

4. Does the method recommend that you go completely cold turkey with no feeding at night? Or do you ease into sleeping through the night?

I've actually not read Ferber's book so i can't attest to his method. Depending on the age of the child and if there are any weight gain issues i think it's a choice about what strategy works best regarding night-time feedings. My personal preference and what i think is easiest to implement is to follow the steps that are outlined in the 12 weeks book and that i shorthanded below to lengthen the times between nighttime feedings and then work on phasing them out all together.

5. How to extend the period of time between feedings? What if she falls sleep during these nighttime feedings?

The 12 hours sleep in 12 weeks book offers step by step guidance for how to lengthen the time between nighttime feedings and eventually work on phasing them out all together. First she tells you to keep a log for a few days of at what times she's eating now and for how long. Then you work on a two-pronged strategy to lengthen the time between the feedings and shorten the feedings until you've eliminated each one.

From your post i think she's eating twice a night roughly around 1 am and 4 am. You set those as your new goalposts and you never feed her earlier than that. If she wakes up earlier you use your toolbox (could be letting her cry, giving her a pacifier, patting her, etc.-- see the book for a complete discussion of different techniques), to get her to the goalposts you set. The idea is to always move the ball forward and not let them creep backwards. If she wakes up and eats at 1:30 am tomorrow that becomes your new goalpost. Basically the idea is if she did it once she can do it again.

You also note how long she's eating. If she eats for 15 minutes at each feeding you start there. Every few days you reduce the amount of time by 2-3 minutes. If at any point she eats for less than that (and doesn't wake up with some gentle prodding) that's your new "time limit." There's something i'm forgetting about the order with which you phase out the feedings. So you're just going to have to read the book!

6. Is it ok if they fall asleep while you’re nursing them, then you wake them back up when they’re in the crib?

Weissbluth argues that it's fine if they fall asleep while they're nursing. It's a normal response to a totally soothing and relaxing ritual. You don't have to undergo any shock treatments to fully wake them up while putting them in the crib. Just lay them down normally so if they wake up they wake up but you're not setting out to arouse them from their peaceful slumber.

7. Should we be “extra quiet” in the rest of the house? We live in a small 1 bedroom floor-thru apartment, and I know Sadie sleeps at daycare when there are toddlers screaming about. So, should we get her to sleep with our standard-noise-level, or do we just need to learn to turn our standard-noise-level down? (we put headphones on to watch tv and tip-toed around the house)

No, you shouldn't be extra quiet. I would recommend the white noise machine (or waves or any other kind of soothing sound machine) to give her some buffer but she needs to be used to sleeping with normal night noises. This will help in the long-run if you ever want her to be able to sleep if it's not perfectly quiet. This won't help if you want to have friends over, and it also won't help if she's at camp sharing bunkbeds and the crickets are too loud.

Finally-- in addition to telling you that you really need to read the books, i'm also going to suggest that you try moving Sadie's bedtime up by 15 minutes and see what happens. Especially if she's struggling with naps i have a feeling she's overtired which makes getting them to sleep that much harder. Reach Weissbluth and we'll talk some more.

Finally, finally from one parent that has gone through this to another: this is hard. It's hard because it's terrible to hear your baby cry, it's terrible to know that the situation before wasn't good and there's no going back, but to not be able to see clear to the other side. It's terrible because as you noted, all the crying and the not knowing and the wondering and the questions sets you on edge, and your partner on edge. Call for support when you need it, read some books so that you've got an expert weighing in with the advantages of a good sleeper, and take breaks from the sleep training. You can take turns walking around the block or running to the drugstore just to get some distance from the crying.

17 Months, 3 Weeks/ 3 Years, 5 Months

Busy, busy, busy which explains why i didn't get a chance to post last week. I was traveling Mon-Wed and the two remaining days didn't leave me much time to catch back up. But, it's about to get crazier. I have at least one trip a month until December and in October i have the craziest 20 days of my work/life balance yet. In 14 days we have two sets of back-to-back houseguests and during that period i have two trips-- one for work to CA and one with the boys to OK. So, if i'm not posting or returning calls, or moving much when i get back, you'll know why.

Here's some updates though to bring you up to speed. Henry's really working on a couple of abstract concepts-- truth and weekends. He gets so excited now when he realizes it's Friday afternoon and it's the weekend! Part of it was just realizing that on Saturday and Sunday he has more time to play around in the morning before we have to get dressed and go to school. Weekends also mean having syrup on your pancakes (we usually have some leftover during the week but JT has a no syrup rule on school mornings), and typically being able to stay up a little bit late.

He's also figuring out what "telling the truth" is, not so much because he's been lying but he'll go to get ready for bed, you'll hear him brushing his teeth, turning off the water, etc, but no toilet flushing. Then he'll run back out, and tell you that "the truth is" he just brushed his teeth and didn't go potty and dawdle a bit and then run back to finish getting ready for bed.

He's also exploring early math concepts. Today he was helping me make a cake and we talked about how we needed to put in 5 eggs. We had already put in four and i asked him how many more we needed to add until we got to 5 eggs. He told me one! It's not like he can do really hard math problems but he's definitely building a relationship to numbers. I had an education-long struggle with math so i'm personally looking forward to starting over with him fresh.

Silas has a little tiny bit of a stuffy nose and some sores in his diaper area. I'm not sure which is the culprit but he's been sleeping terribly. Last night i was up and down with him 4 times over an hour and a half and he only finally went to sleep once we moved him upstairs. Although he has the pain threshold of a linebacker something tiny gets out of whack and his sleeping goes off the rails. We're going to call the Doctor tomorrow to try to get him in-- we're due for his 18 month appointment anyway.

Will Summer Come Again?

From August 2008

We wrapped up the official end of summer (while trying to confirm that summer will indeed rise again) with a pretty decent weekend. It was something along "it was the best of times, it was the worst of times," because while i had 5 days off work and home with the boys, one of those was an official sick day and the rest involved a mix of us all being under the weather, being somewhat better, hosting a bbq, and trying to enjoy summers passing. Of course with the weather hotter than it's been all summer, it's been a little hard to get too teary-eyed about the changing seasons.

We didn't make it to the pool again after i took the boys on Friday, but i think i'm going to look into swim lessons for Henry this fall. We haven't completely decided what we're going to do about him and gym class. We're waiting until at least the fall session to enroll because right now he's getting a lot of the same practice and exercise by frequent park visits.

I think because they've been sick, the boys' sleep skills have deteriorated a bit. Each night it's at least one of them up a few times- and sometimes both. Henry was crying out for me the other night and when i went down to figure out what was wrong he was sitting-up in bed saying "let's play" over and over to me. I'm not sure he was awake but after he called out for me an hour later i told him that he needed to remember to just roll over and go back to sleep if he woke up at night. I think he's back on the right path, but in the meantime, Silas has been waking up and when i go down to comfort him at night ... (as he just did with perfect timing) he won't quiet down and points out of his room. He's definitely at the point where everything is more exciting than sleeping even in the middle of the night. So we'll see. When it gets really bad i put him in the pack-n-play upstairs but i'm hoping not to make a habit of that.

17 Months/ 3 Years, 4 Months

Today Silas' turns 17 months old and unfortunately he's home sick with his first cold of the season. Nothing major we hope but we noticed yesterday evening that his nose seemed pretty stuff. His temperament was normal and he went to bed quietly at 7. Around 9 he woke up crying and couldn't be shushed back to sleep.

I thought maybe his teeth were bothering him because he was sitting up in his crib gnawing on his pacifier with his back teeth and looking like he had buckets of drool running down his face. I'm guessing now that it was actually mucus. I gave him some Tylenol, got him to lay down and covered him up, but within seconds of leaving his room he was moaning/crying again and with Henry being wide-awake it looked like no one would be going to sleep soon.

So we said good night to Henry brought Silas upstairs, set up the humidifier in the closet that doubled as his bedroom for 10+ months, rocked him for a bit and put him down to bed. While we were working on getting Silas settled Henry starts screaming for me-- going from a normal "mommy" call to a hysterical "MOMMEEE" in about 2 iterations. When JT went down to check on him he was upset because the cat was in his room and he didn't want the cat in his room, he wanted the door closed.

I was prepared for a rough night but miraculously they both slept soundlessly once everyone was settled. Silas seems okay today but still very congested so JT kept him home from daycare. He's taking a morning nap now which means he probably is feeling run down.

Emergency Preparedness

We made it through the severe thunderstorms and tornado warning but not without a rough night. About the time the storms started at 8 we lost power and it was out until sometime between 9:30 and 11:00 this morning. I like thunderstorms, but this was severe earth shaking thunder that just stayed on top of us without quickly moving away-- and that was the third set of storms at that point.

The boys miraculously slept through the first two storms but by the time the third one came along with Zeus camping out on our house, both boys woke up. Henry was freaked out by how dark it was (i by how sweat-soaked his sheet was with no a/c and no fan) but after turning on a battery powered nightlight, he was fine and told us to leave his room so he could go back to sleep.

Silas-- our adventurer was less assured and spent about half an hour supposedly cuddling in bed with us until the thunderstorm had passed. Between the crying and the thunder bolts and the sweating, i didn't sleep soundly.

Today after some coffee shop wifi life got back to normal. But, not without a serious task to prepare an emergency kit. We were woefully unprepared for the loss of power. You'd never know i spent my formative years doing homework by the kerosene lamp. In fact that little led nightlight was about the only thing we had that was helpful. So in goes some matches, a lighter, some candles, led candles, cards, flashlight and batteries, a hand crank radio and a first aid kit. Any other suggestions i'm all ears.

Pulling-up and Museum Visit

Let's start with Silas. I know i haven't been posting as often as i could be, so i'll try to catch you up. We had a great visit with my parents this weekend and the weather actually cooperated-- there were a few 40 degree days in there-- of course we're paying for it now, with a high of 8 today and everything iced-over solid.

But, i promised news on Silas. He's now successfully pulliing up on a variety of things-- not all the time, but enough to know he *can* do it. It seems his planets have to be aligned just right before he'll pull on up past his knees-- sometimes he just scoots over, pulls up, and that's that. Other times he'll repeatedly pull to his knees and then lower, pull to his knees and lower-- and repeat. The great fun is that he's trying out some of his new skills in his crib. We often find him sitting up when he's done napping- or if he doesn't want to take a nap. We've also found him standing up throwing things out of his crib too. This is unchartered territory for us because Henry pretty much only stood once you came into the room to get him out and that was as recently as last summer. I'm thinking we may need to be looking for a crib tent if he makes any moves towards climbing.

He's also developing quite a little personality. He likes to dive bomb out of your arms to both try to get to the ground but also to throw you off balance-- he'll look back up and give you a coy smile. He's also a champion peek-a-bool player and laughs and laughs when tickled. He easily moves from his stomach to sitting and vice versa by getting in the crawling position, but if you put him in the crawling postion-- he'll just sit down and scoot-- his preferred method of transportation.

Silas is definitely in a bit of a mommy phase. When i'm in the room he wants my full attention and will loundly complain until he gets it. He also does this when i leave, but once i'm out of sight he's generally content with whomever. One exception which i'm so happy about-- is that when i bring him to Ms. Brenda's he exceitedly kicks his legs and isn't the least bit sad to see me go. I know some Moms have a hard time with this transition to the a beloved caretaker, but i can only see the positive-- makes going on to work that much easier for me.

Henry enjoyed his grandparents as much as always and we had a great visit to the nature museum. They have a butterfly room which seemed to be Henry's favorite (we made two visits) as well as a river waterway you can play in which he also enjoyed. It was fun to go and to see how differently he interacted with parts of the museum compared to our visit a year ago.

How much longer is winter?

I remember being really smug last year because i made it all the way to April before getting spring fever.  My track record has improved a little each year-- less whining, later deployment of my long underwear, more acceptance of the weather.  I'm afraid that the linear development of my winter hardiness is going to go madly off the rails this year.  Last week we got a ton of snow-- around a foot all told and life just marched right along.  On Sunday night we got another 3 inches or so in about 2 hours.  Thankfully the sleet that was predicted came later and in the form of rain, but yesterday was marked by such dense fog that i felt like i was in the steam room at my favorite spa-- sans nice warm heat.  It's grey and supposed to rain more today, but that was okay because it's warmish (30s) but tonight, it's supposed to snow another foot in a major storm.  Seriously?  I'm about to stop whining because i know i do live in Chicago and all, but this accumulation of 8 inches here, another foot there, that doesn't melt but just adds up to lots of black gross snow is wearing on me-- when does spring start?
Adding to my winter woes is Silas' cold which he came down with on Sunday.  He ran a low-grade fever and slept fitfully enough so we kept him home yesterday.  Henry has a mild case as well but his seems confined to a stuffy nose.  Although Silas did not nap as long as we were all hoping yesterday, he slept like a champ through the night and seemed to be improving today.  I bundled them both off to school and hopefully that was the right decision. 
Because of Silas' cold, we temporarily suspended our room-sharing transition.  Which is too bad because by the end of last week i think we had turned a corner.  After some very stern talks with Henry, he finally went back to getting into bed and falling asleep rather than carrying on for an hour after he went down.  Hence, Silas slept much more soundly as well.  Depending on how Silas does at Brenda's today, we'll decide whether to keep him upstairs with us or bunk him back with Henry.

10 Months / 2 Years, 9 Months

I think it's safe to say the dust is still settling in the bedroom shake-up. We've decided that since we don't actually need the top bunk right now we're going to take it back off. Henry and Silas' room is not very big and the tall bunk beds kind of tower over everything making the room feel like submarine sleeping quarters. Plus, although the fact that the upper bunk is lower than a normal bunked is great in the event of an unexpected fall, it lends itself to lots of bumped heads by mom and dad. So, hopefully tonight we'll take it back off and stow it away in the basement.

Both kiddos are pretty square with sleeping through the night, but, they've been engaging in all kinds of antics before finally falling asleep (Henry) or after an initial wake-up. JT said that two nights ago he had been listening to Henry chatter away but somehow something just wasnt right. He went in to check and Henry was out of bed standing next to Silas' crib trying to fix his jungle crib toy that had fallen over. Last night i got home in time to put both boys to bed. When Henry was getting in bed he told me that "baby might cry again." I told him that if Silas did cry Henry could talk to him or sing to him. Bad idea. Again we were greeted by Henry chattering and then squeals of laughter by Silas. It took awhile to settle them back down and then they were out for the night.

So, we're going to keep at this room-sharing thing. I know it will work itself out in the end but every night is an adventure.

Quick Silas update, JT said that while i was gone Silas is trying to pull up on anything and everything. He's not been successfull yet, but it's always nice to see signs of forward progress in the little ones :)

Back-up Childcare

One thing about having little kids, is the need for someone to have a flexible work schedule. Thankfully JT and i both can usually adapt our work schedule depending on what arises. This flexibility was put into practice today while our daycare provider had to be unexpectedly closed. I guess they found a gas leak at the house next door yesterday and the gas had to be shut off to houses on both sides of the house with the leak. No gas means no heat and no heat means no kids. So, JT stayed home this morning while i worked and then i took over until they (thankfully) both went down for a nap 2 hours ago. I'm expecting them to wake-up anytime, but JT should be home in another 1/2 hour or so which means i will easily get a full day's work in.

It doesn't always happen, but Silas often takes an afternoon nap that at least partially overlaps with Henry's. I think that we're moving more and more to Silas taking naps by the clock which should mean a solid chunk of naptime for both of them in the afternoon. Henry fights his nap a little more now, and can often be heard singing and chattering to himself long after he's in bed, but once he's asleep he generally sleeps the full two hours, so i don't think we're going to be phasing out the afternoon nap anytime soon.

This past week Henry seemed to really be struggling with falling asleep at night. He'd often call out to us after having been in bed an hour or more only to tell us that he didn't know how to fall asleep. Last night that didn't happen so i'm hoping it was either a very short phase, or that it coincided with old Ralph being gone for the weekend. That's right folks. We left old Ralph at Brenda's over the long holiday weekend. On accident for sure, but we didn't know what to expect the first night. Henry wasn't really too phased by it once we explained that his job was to keep Ms. Brenda warm for the weekend and that Mr. Frog was staying in bed with Henry to keep *him* warm. He didn't make a fuss really but he did take 1+ hours to fall asleep each night Ralph was gone. We'll see over the next few weeks if this is a new development or Ralph-related.

Speaking of new developments, right now we're planning to move Silas downstairs this weekend into Henry's room. It was always the plan to have them share a room, but we've been waiting until Silas' sleep habits improved and he wasn't breastfeeding anymore. I think we've by and large taken care of both of those issues so we're going to bite the bullet this weekend.

Silas Sleep Bulletin

I've spared you some of the gory details, but after being on a wild sleep roller coaster with Silas over the past 6 months, we finally knuckled down and "sleep trained" little Silas. If you've been glancing at "Silas Wake-Ups" box you might have noticed a recent string of un-interrupted nights of sleep. After we got past possibly the very worst night of my life, Silas has just slept well.

His night wakings were increasing in frequency and duration and he was proving averse to going back to sleep. It was like dealing with a drug-resistant strain of baby sleep virus. We knew that after the New Year we were going to work on sleep training but had purposefully put it off until we were back home from our New Year's trip to Michigan. While in Michigan we were all sleeping in one room and we were away from home which were not ideal conditions under which to begin the process.

Unfortunately it was also really hard for anyone to get to sleep if Silas was getting up 4-5 times a night and not going back to sleep. So, start the training we did. The first night wasn't too bad-- i think he cried off and on for about 45 minutes and then slept through the rest of the night. The second night however, was potentially the worst night truly of my life.* He cried off and on for 3 hours (until 2 in the morning) at which point i finally picked him up and held him and got him to calm down enough to go to sleep.

Henry's worst night clocked in at 1 hour 40 minutes, but he was all scream from the first second you laid him down. Silas is more fuss, whine, cry a little, quiet down and just sound mad (ba, ba, ba, ba) then start fussing and crying so more, a little screaming, quiet down, repeat. It's like because he's more mild-mannered he has more energy to extend his stubbornness. So, i figured that this sleep training was actually going to be worse with Silas than it was with Henry.

But thankfully we made it through the horrible night and since then it's been almost all smooth sailing. Last weekend he woke up both nights for about 10-20 minutes and then went back to sleep on his own. All this sleeping has us thinking that before too much longer Silas will be moving downstairs into the room with Henry. The only thing holding me back is that Silas still nurses in the morning and it's a lot easier to take care of that upstairs than downstairs will Henry will then be guaranteed to wake up shouting "i want to help you make coffee!"

*i'm thinking the only other contender would be the time JT and i got lost in the woods at night trying to re-find our tent (without a source of light). After JT almost stumbled off a cliff we decided to lay down and sleep right there on the ground. It was fall in the Shenandoah so we had on light cotton sweaters and shorts, which even with the newspapers we were using as a blanket, was still the coldest, most horrible night i've ever had. I guess at least with sleep training i was warm.

Official end of Summer-- boo, hoo

I think we did a pretty good job sending summer out. Saturday we bought a new tv and JT re-taught Henry how to do the "touchdown" sign after spending most of the day relaxing in front of college football. Yesterday we went back out to Tabitha's pool and Henry had another great time. He seemed even more comfortable in the water this weekend than last weekend. Tabitha and i talked about trying to get the kids to the pool during the winter months-- even just for some free swim. It will be an additional option for outings during the long winter months.

Today we met 3 other families at the zoo and Henry definitely enjoyed seeing all the "aminals." He saw giraffes, and elephants, lots of monkeys and even an otter. I think his favorite might have been the polar bears. Both days we were home by early afternoon, which was nice to have time to accomplish all the weekend chores that need doing.

Silas has had a fairly eventful weekend as well even though all the outings weren't exactly targeted at him. He has been rolling over sporadically for the past several weeks but this weekend he pretty much non-stop started rolling. Unfortunately he has been exercising his legs when it's time for sleep, so naptimes have been pretty rough.

Summer Deluge

I'm really glad that Henry got over his "scared phase" before all of these summer thunderstorms hit. Some of them have been absolutely gigantic-- very loud and very close. He just says "big rain" very dramatically and makes the sign for rain falling. He also sleeps through them no problem.

This weekend is supposed to be clear, which is good because we've finally managed to plan our big pool outing with Tabitha and her family. We've made it to our local pool several times this summer, but the pool out by Tab's family is more like a water park than the local pool. Henry had an amazing time out there last summer so hopefully he'll enjoy it as much this year.

I tweaked the side-bar items a tiny bit. Silas is mostly sleeping through the night now. By mostly i mean that he goes to sleep around 6:30 and i don't get him out of the crib until 6 am. Most nights he wakes up once or twice and i give him the pacifier and he goes right back to sleep. So, now i'll document what times he woke up during the night. I also added an item to help me keep track of my frozen milk supply.

I've been working down in the basement the past several nights trying to get things organized and cleaned up so that i can move ahead with my playroom plans. Right now i'm planning on areas for: arts and crafts, dress-up, sand table, blocks and big motor play, i.e balls, bikes, and slide. I know the big motor stuff will be necessary during the long winter months, but i think the dress-up area will be a big hit too. Henry is getting more and more into imaginative play. He frequently makes "soup" for us and "cold treats" and loves to watch us pretend to eat his concoctions. I let him wear an old costume of mine the other day and he had a ball parading around. I can't wait to raid our closets to find all manner of good dress-up items!

4M/ 3W/ 4D, 2Y/ 4M/ 4D

So i survived! JT was gone for 5 days, count-em 5 whole days, and i can tell you honestly that i've never been so happy to see anyone as when he walked in the door late Sunday afternoon. It's not that it's impossible to manage two children, and our two children are pretty mellow, but working both the am and pm shift when Silas isn't fully sleeping through the night is difficult-- definitely more difficult than i'm used to. Saturday we had a nice day, as we were able to get out to the park and hang out with Corey, Troy and Kerala. Kerala and Silas seemed to really enjoy their baby face off and playing with the same toys.

Sunday was a slightly different story. It's been raining and raining and raining and Sunday in particular was one long rainstorm. This prevented us from getting to the park or even the back-yard which made for one very wound-up 2 year old. I can tell that if i was a stay-at-home mom i would need to have a schedule and a bottomless list of in-door activities to handle inclement weather days.

As has been the case for the last several weekends, Silas' naps were great on Saturday and pretty terrible on Sunday. I can't quite figure out what the difference is, but Saturday he goes to sleep easily and takes naps that are 1-2 hours in duration. Sunday brings increasing bouts of fighting sleep and 30-45 minute naps which result in a fussy baby by the afternoon.

One of the strategies i used while JT was gone, was to break our time up among the different levels of our house. Typically Henry spends most of his time on the first level of the house where his room and the playroom are. We have some toys upstairs for him and i set-up a small tv and dvd player that we used when i was showering. In addition, i took him down to the basement with me while i tackled organizing projects (we have 7 18-gallon containers of baby clothes (!)) and he was absolutely enthralled with all the "old" toys that are stored down there. I decided that while our basement is never going to be "finished" that i'm going to do some upgrades down there so that the basement can be an indoor playspace during the winter. I've already started on some basic things but i'll try to take some before and after pictures to post.

Upcoming Travel

How could i resist posting again when i'm awash in wonderful pictures of my little ones? U do find we wind up with many more pictures of active Henry than Silas who's mostly still laying around. I'm trying to keep him in the mix though, i promise.

In addition to seeing the acupuncturist/herbalist to bolster my wimpy immune system, i'm also trying some new things to help me be able to fall asleep easier. For as long as i can remember it has taken me an eternity to fall asleep at night. In the past few years it's turned into a bonafide problem-- i often top an hour before i actually fall asleep-- even on nights that i:
-didn't drink anything caffeinated after 3 pm
-exercised (but not within 2 hours of bedtime)
-turned the tv off within an hour of bedtime
-read for a little while before trying to go to sleep.

So in addition to the nightly benadryl i'm taking for the time being, i'm trying a few other things that are decidedly more new-agey. I'm not kept awake by stress-related thoughts, but by exciting plans and projects-- often garden or home-decorating/renovating in nature. I wind up hitting on a project and become consumed thinking through all the details-- from design to implementation. I try to put the thoughts out of my head, but it's nigh impossible.

So, i'm trying to journal as many project ideas before i lay down so my brain has less to work with. I'm also experimenting with guided relaxation cds, to get myself as close to comatose as possible before my brain starts going nuts. Ania, my acupuncturist, recommended a technique i think she called "acknowledge the snowflake before it becomes an avalanche." You basically say "yes i'm thinking about installing special shelves for my shoes in the closet" and move on to another thought before you find yourself compelled to get out of bed and measure your closet's South wall.

Oh, but this blog is about the children you say? Well, it's important that i get my sleep so that i can be a good mom. And Henry woke up at 5:45 this morning, so sleep is on my mind.

Could i be...

getting better? Heaven forbid i write that because i'll probably be in the ER overnight, but for now i feel like the congestion clouds are clearing. If you call and i answer, you'll still think you're talking to our butler, because my voice sounds that bad, but my sinuses are pretty much clear and i'm not constantly cycling between chills and sweats.

Summer colds are no good not only because your sick when you just shouldn't be, but also because summer is a precious commodity and being laid up when the summer days are ticking by is nothing short of frustrating. One low key thing i've been able to do even when sick is make batches of granita. Henry was digging on his "cold treat" last night and it occurred to me that some of you might be interested, so i'm including my *recipes* here. Unless you can deal with some mess i would stick to the berry one-- it just couldn't be easier.

Berries
1 1/2 cups fresh fruit or 1 12-ounce bag frozen
1/3-1/2 cup sugar
3/4 cup water
1 TBSP lemon juice
Puree berries in food processor with water, freeze

Cherries
1 1/2 cups pitted fruit
3/4 cup sugar
water
Simmer cherries in sugar syrup 5 minutes
Puree with syrup
Strain out skins, freeze

Henry is going through a renewed "no" phase. It's a bit trying, but also slightly humorous because he says it very matter of factly: Henry, come put your shoes on so we can go to school. "no." He doesn't say it emphatically or dramatically or with a question mark at that end--it's just an even "no." I think he's discovered that he can say no and that it starts to drive people crazy. Mainly we deal with it by reminding him of the fun things that will happen if he does said task, i.e. "let's put your shoes on so we can go see all your friends at school." If that doesn't work than we usually resort to tickling him or picking him up and "flying" him around or something physical and fun to divert the power struggle.

Silas, my little darling, slept for 11 hours last night. We've been making pretty steady progress with his night-time wakings and had gotten to where he didn't start stirring until around 4:30 or 5. Last night however, he went to sleep around 6:30 and didn't make a peep until 6:04 when he woke-up ready to eat and tackle the day.

irreconcilable globule

You know those spam messages you get with the really random subject lines? This was the title of one i received recently that i've been saving for just such a time as tonight-- i'm not near my calendar to tell you how old everyone is and i can't think of anything topical-- so irreconcilable globule it is.

I'm still dragging around this stuffy nose and hacking cough, but dangnabit, tonight was babysitter night so we went out anyway. Not only is having a regular babysitter gig good for JT and i-- it's fun for me because i get to dress up on a semi-regular basis. What with working at home and having two small children, i don't exactly have fashion on the top of my list. At least once every few weeks i put some thought into what i'm wearing and how i look. On that front, i have an achievement to document, although i'm befuddled about how it happened.

By the scale's account i haven't lost any weight since six weeks post-partum. I'm still carrying around about a baker's dozen of extra pounds. Tonight, i decided just to see if one of my pre-pregnancy skirts fit and voila! it does! I'm not talking stretchy waist-band skirt either. It's full, but the waist fit and that's nothing to sniff at. So i'm hoping that with my ramp-up in exercise and trying to be sensible about eating, i'll start to make more progress.

Silas is doing spectacular. He's so happy and animated and getting really into his toys-- at least the little toys on his bouncer. He grabs and swats at them so forcefully they wind up wound around the toy-bar like the swings at a derelict park. At night he likes to eat and get ready for bed pretty promptly at 6. By 6:30 he's in his crib and maybe fussing a little but quickly soothes himself to sleep. Last night he didn't wake up at all until 4:30 am, although most mornings by about 5:30 he's up and the last 30 minutes until breakfast at 6 can be tough.

Henry is seriously working on potty-training now. He's wearing underwear during the day and getting better about telling us before he actually needs to go. I downloaded a sticker chart to use with him and he was definitely psyched to start seeing those stickers marching along the path. He's still omitting articles and doesn't use many pronouns, but he's in the process of learning about plurality. He'll talk about one bird and two birds over and over again. He's also getting to where he's trying to speak in longer story-like sentences. He doesn't have all the words yet, but a typical exchange was yesterday night at dinner when he was telling me about his morning with Daddy: WEEK-Up, No Open, Close-- Daddy!, No, Daddy!, close, Daddy- WEEK-Up, eat! Translation, I woke up and my door was closed, i called Daddy, but nothing. I called Daddy again but my door was still closed. I called Daddy really loudly and told him to wake-up that i wanted to eat!

Single Parenting

Thankfully JT comes home today after being out of town several days. I can honestly tell you that if was the single-parent of two small children i would a) be seriously sleep-deprived and b) not be a very nice person. It hasn't helped that i've been dealing with round two of the sniffles, but this getting up early thing is for the birds (or the Daddy as our case may be.) This morning Silas and Henry woke up at 5:30 and although i told Henry it was still the middle of the night and made him stay in bed, i don't think he slept anymore and he was definitely calling out for me by about 6.

Although i'm exhausted, Silas is doing pretty well on the sleep front. Two nights ago he went to sleep without a peep and only woke up very briefly at 1:30. Last night he cried a little bit-- about 15-20 minutes, but slept through until 5:30 before stirring. I'm thankful for that at least.

Related to sleep, we got new beds at the old homestead-- both for us and for the guest room. This should make staying with us more enjoyable-- or at least restful. Anybody have any need for a 20 year + full mattress and box springs? Yeah, i'd say we were due for an upgrade! We sprung for a Queen size bed and the additional room is easy to get used to. Now i can have JT, the cat and Silas all sleeping in bed with me and not feel like i have to be razor thin to fit.

4 Months, 4 Days/ 2 Years, 3 Months, 1 Week

I know i've been remiss in posting lately. I have a few ideas for things i'd like to write that will require me to sit-down and focus, and i haven't been able to come up with that time lately. Work has certainly picked up and we've been pretty busy on the personal front as well.

Because Chicago has a much longer winter than summer i feel like each weekend, nay each day, needs to have enjoyable summer activities planned into it. Of course we have to schedule laundry and grocery shopping in there somewhere, but we've been doing a pretty good job of accomplishing fun stuff. Friday we finally made it to the pool by our house and Henry got excited all over again about swimming. I've taken to heading there after i pick the boys up from Brenda's, because the baby pool area is completely shaded and it's not as busy as on the weekends. We only wind up with about 30 minutes before the pool closes but that's a decent-enough amount of time-- especially considering Silas would really prefer to start getting ready for bed around 6-- more on Silas and sleep later.

This weekend we enjoyed a really nice bbq at Tiffany and Mike's house and Henry FINALLY got to see "Mike's Dogs" as he calls Zippy and Josie. Even better, he got to play "Hide Seek" with Helen and Carys. A high point of the night for us was that Henry went to bed uncomplainingly on a pallet on their floor, and Silas slept in the pack-n-play without much fuss. Unfortunately neither of our kids have ever let us fulfill the "transferring a sleeping child to the car" scenario that i see in my minds-eye movie of parenting. Our children wake-up and stay awake-- looking dazed, all the way home. Henry always goes right back to sleep once he's in his own bed, but this move threw Silas off his game. And here's where i start to become consumed by sleep issues again...

On Saturday Silas took a 5 (!) hour nap and went to bed like normal right about 6:30. We woke him around 11 to head home and he didn't sleep great that night (which didn't surprise me). The next day however, he wouldn't nap for more than 30-45 minutes at a stint and would wake up absolutely crying. He couldn't be soothed back to sleep and in general seemed overtired and miserable. That night i worked and worked to get him to go to sleep for the night and he put up a fight to say the least. We decided that it was time to commit to sleep training the little guy. We went through this with Henry around this time and it was truly terrible.

I was feeling like it was almost worse with Silas because he was surprisingly stubborn when it came to sleep training. Silas has been and continues to be a happy mellow baby. Everything i've read about babies with mild temperaments indicates that you might have around 20 minutes of crying and you've got the whole thing whipped in 3 days. The first night Silas cried off and on for 2 hours. Most of the time it wasn't full-on screaming, but he was definitely crying and NOT sleeping. Last night was better-- i think he only cried 20 minutes when we put him down, but he cried quite a few times during the middle of the night. He hasn't eaten in the middle of the night for almost a month but he's very resistant to falling back asleep on his own.

I was feeling drained and vulnerable the way only an infant's incessant crying can make you feel so i re-read some of my sleep books-- in particular Weissbluth's Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. He helped me remember why we were "sleep training" in the first place and realize that this is short-term pain for long-term progress. After my experiences with Henry i do truly believe that good sleep habits are a crucial skill for babies to learn.

The only thing that caught me off guard, is that we're having to "teach" Silas these habits. I thought we might have lucked into one of those babies that somehow figure this out on their own. That's why the first night of crying was so difficult and unexpected. I'm hoping that with some good naps under our belt, and reduced crying at bedtime (and did i mention that 6 pm bedtime routine) we'll be on our way to solid-sleep habits for all of us. I'll let you know.